Jonah Goldberg loves scat, the folks on JournoList are morans

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I've employed some pretty nasty metaphors in my day. There's one about giving Sarah Palin a standing O that I'm more than a wee bit embarrassed by.

But I've got to hand to conservative columnist Jonah Goldberg: He is the King Shit of Bad Metaphors. The Prince of Poop. The Top Turd.

The evidence? Goldberg's latest column on JournoList, the listserv in which journalists plotted and schemed to discredit Palin and to find a way to keep reports about the racist who-ha spewing out of pastor Jeremiah Wright's mouth from ever reaching the mainstream.

Here's the opening (courtesy of the National Review):

The JournoList has started to leak like an overripe diaper.

Just in case you've been living in a cave, or if you only get your news from MSNBC, here's the story. A young blogger, Ezra Klein, formerly of the avowedly left-wing American Prospect and now with the avowedly mainstream Washington Post, founded the e-mail listserv Journolist for like-minded liberals to hash out and develop ideas.

OK. It's not particularly appetizing, but it's affective.

But then there's this:

Now the diaper is coming off entirely. Perhaps stretching the diaper metaphor too far, what’s inside JournoList may stink, but it’s no surprise that it does. JournoList e-mails obtained by the Daily Caller reveal what anybody with two neurons to rub together already knew: Professional liberals don’t like Republicans and do like Democrats. They can be awfully smug and condescending in their sense of intellectual and moral superiority. They tend to ascribe evil motives to their political opponents — sometimes even when they know it’s unfair. One obscure blogger insisted that liberals should arbitrarily demonize a conservative journalist as a racist to scare conservatives away from covering stories that might hurt Obama.

Yes, Jonah, you stretched it too far. At least by mainstream standards. But not for me. I think you pinched when you should have pushed. Next time, unload, bubba. Let it all go. Get all 2Girls1Cup crazy and blow it out with a really, really, way-the-frak-out-there metaphor, the nastier the better.

That said, Goldberg's got a point. Them liberals in the media are a crafty bunch. They're constantly plotting and scheming to bring down the GOP and prop up their Democratic Party cohorts. Unfortunately, they are also morans.

For one, journalists shouldn't post to listservs. The only reason a reporter needs to subscribe to a listserv is to see what other folks — generally fringy types — are saying. It's about gathering intel and turning to your workmates and mocking something some earnest asshat or an overzealous causehead has said.

And two, you never ever use your real name. Never. Keep it safe. Keep it secret.

In the end, you can chalk this up to another example of how the progressive political machine just doesn't have it together in the same way their conservative opponents do. Hell, they don't even understand that a conspiracy needs to stay a secret and that all of its participants have to remain anonymous.

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