by Chris Haire
By now, most of you have probably heard about Winthrop University's recent poll.
You know, the one that showed that 29.5 percent of Republicans in South Carolina believe that President Barack Obama is a Muslim.
The one that indicated that 12.4 percent of SCGOPers believe that Obama was definitely born in another country while 23.6 percent believe he was probably born somewhere other than Honolulu, Hawaii.
I don't see a need to discuss that.
What I want to talk about is what else the poll tells us about South Carolinian Republicans.
When asked how they would rate the condition of South Carolina's economy these days, 24.8 said it was better than the nation's as a whole, while 54.7 said it was the same.
South Carolina is currently ranked fourth among states with the highest unemployment rates. (Our unemployment numbers went up to 11.1 last week.) By all accounts, South Carolina is one of the states hardest hit by the Great Recession.
How these Republican voters missed all of this is beyond me? Maybe they don't read the news? Maybe they've buried their thick heads in the pluff mud? Maybe they're so focused on the gridiron battle that is Beltway politics — you know the one in which the Lying Libs have a slight lead on the underdog Golden GOPers who have the ball on the Libs 10-yard with 1 minute to go — that they are distracted from the leaking septic tank that is South Carolina's economy?
Now, here's where it gets really interesting.
Sixty-three percent of Republicans believe that the national economy is very bad, while 30.7 percent believe it is fairly bad. However, when these same GOPers were asked about their personal financial situations, 8.7 said it was excellent, 48.3 said it was good, and 32.1 percent said it was fair; only 9.3 percent said it was poor.
So let me get this straight: South Carolina Republicans believe the economy as a whole is going down the shitter, but when it comes to their finances, well, they're doing A-OK. If this is the case, then why are they so glum. And believe you me, these are a grim bunch; 77.7 believe the national economy is getting worse, while 50.8 percent believe the Palmetto State's econ is getting closer and closer to belly-uping
It's almost like they are addicted to bad news. It's almost like they have a nearly pathological need to believe that the United States is going to hell in a handbasket now that that goddamn, brown-skinned Muslim is in the White House.
And it gets even worse.
The vast majority of those polled — 70 frikkin percent — believe that the War on Terror has made U.S. citizens safer, when in reality our overseas actions have only stoked the fires of extremism around the globe. Seriously guys, don't make me bust out some Jack Hunter on your asses.
Meanwhile, 66.2 percent believe it is necessary to sacrifice our rights in the fight against the evil forces of Cobra. Yo fucking Joe.
OK. I'm going to stop here for my own sanity. There's an entire section of the poll on Nikki Haley, and, well, I just don't want to get into that. I've got the next three days off of work and I've already gotten off to bad start.