by Chris Haire
I've been saying for months now that Barack Obama is all but destined to win a second term.
Yes, the economy is gloomy, but it's getting better, slowly but surely.
Yes, he's unpopular, but no single GOP contender will inspire the masses — in particular independents — to swarm the polls on Election Day.
Yes, neither the Right nor the Left is satisfied with Obamacare — the GOPers think it'll bring death panels and European-style socialism to the U.S., while the Dems are pissed the plan doesn't create a single-payer system — but the fact remains that he killed Osama bin Laden and indirectly took out Muammar Gaddafi and that is pretty fucking badass.
So the case is pretty clear: the dude is just unbeatable.
Or at least that's what I thought.
Now, I'm beginning to think otherwise. If Mitt Romney and Ron Paul are on the Republican ticket together, Obama's re-election hopes will collapse quicker than Demi Moore after huffing a few whip-its.
What's particularly funny about this scenario is that it's just so fucking clear. It just makes sense.
But now, thanks to a report in today's Washington Post, that plan just might be in the works. Amy Gardner of WaPo reports:
Romney’s aides are “quietly in touch with Ron Paul,” according to a Republican adviser who is in contact with the Romney campaign and spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss its internal thinking. The two campaigns have coordinated on minor things, the adviser said — even small details, such as staggering the timing of each candidate’s appearance on television the night of the New Hampshire primary for maximum effect.
One advantage for Romney is that Paul’s presence in the race helps keep the GOP electorate fractured. But there is also a growing recognition that the congressman plans to stay in the contest over the long term — and that accommodating him and his supporters could help unify Republican voters in the general election against President Obama.
Now Gardner isn't saying that Mitt and Ron are a lock to partner in November, but you would have to be naive to think the two — or at least their people — have not discussed it and perhaps are even working out a deal right now. And if they haven't, well, then they should.
Why? We all know that few Republicans are enthusiastic about Romney, but plenty of GOPers will vote for him on Election Day anyway. And because of that lack of enthusiasm, the Republicans will turn out fewer voters than the Democrats. But if you throw Paul into the mix, you will immediately win the support of the most passionate fan base in politics today; more importantly, it's a fan base that includes what could easily be a nearly equal number of right-wingers and left-wingers. The end result: Paul is the only Republican in this race who can siphon off some of the left-leaning voters that Obama needs to win.
Some may argue that Paul's revolutionaries view Romney as the quintessential establishment stooge. And that may be true. But the partnership will not stop them from voting for Paul. Nothing short of a zombie apocalypse will prevent that from happening. The same goes if Ron's son Rand ends up being Mitt's running mate. Paul fans know that father and son are virtually one and the same.
Of course, if a Romney-Paul ticket ends up a reality, then there is only one move left for Obama, and that's to ditch Joe Biden and pick up Hillary Clinton. And right now, Hillary is not only the most admired woman in America — a honor she's held for 10 years — she's probably the sole member of the Obama administration who has earned the respect of the average Republican voter thanks to her nearly spotless tenure as the Secretary of State. With Clinton on the ticket, Obama just might win again.