Blue Monday (News Wrap)

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• You woke up this morning, ready to take on a new week and show the world that this Monday would finally be different — then you learn that today is the most depressing day of the year. Well, there's always next Monday.

• "Gen. Butt Naked" confesses to 20,000 deaths. Osama Bin Laden shocked that his codename of "Col. Clothing Optional" turned out to be a trend.

• The Associated Press has written Britney Spears' obituary. To be fair, while success may have now escaped her in her long-toothed 26 years, we've got a feeling she'll be giving chroniclers more to write about.

• "Daydream Believer" writer dies. We're actually kind-of surprised that he survived this…

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