by John Stoehr
The Upright Citizens Brigade Touring Company.
The long-form improv troupe out of New York performed last night at Theatre 99 and managed to riff off one of humankind's most arcane topics — labial tattoos (yes, this is another vagina-oriented joke, but hey, I don't make this shit up, I just report it). They struck gold when the audience member they asked to join them on stage turned out to be an art student (seated above) whose parents are doctors — his father a surgeon, his mother a gynecologist.
When they asked if she shared stories about her work life, he said she did. His mother once told him about a woman who had the logo of Harley-Davidson tattooed along her nether region, starting at her hoo-hoo and spreading gloriously along her thighs. UCB asked if this woman was being paid. He said no. She did it for herself.
Thus was the groundwork laid for a hilarious improv string that went from a woman being offered money, lots of money, to have her hoo-hoo tattooed with corporate logos — one to the other until we got to Chick-fil-A, which is famously open only six days a week, with the Corporate Saints setting aside the Sabbath as a day of rest.
And the punchline: "What do you mean we can't fuck on Sundays?"