Blotter O' The Week:
An employee of a downtown seafood restaurant was arrested for allegedly stealing $40 in crab dip and two pockets full of crackers. Arrested? We'll think twice before we take any more pens home from the office. We'll still do it, but we'll think twice about it.

Man O' Many Words O' The Week:
During a traffic stop, an officer asked the driver, who seemed to be impaired, where he was coming from. He said, "Work." The officer asked where he was going, and the man said, "Home." The officer asked if the man had anything to drink before he got behind the wheel. "A few," he replied. When the officer asked how many "a few" was, the man said, "A few is a few."

A teenager rode by a young girl on his pink bike and the two got into an argument. The boy left and returned later with what's believed to have been a cup of urine and threw it on the girl.

Last week, a peninsula man was riding his bike while his dog ran beside him. The dog became uncooperative, so the man began tugging on the leash. A passing van stopped, and the driver got out to berate the man for abusing his animal, then punched him and stole the dog.

A man tried to defend himself from an intruder with a baseball bat, but the alleged perp put the homeowner in a bear hug to avoid getting hit. When a third party broke up the fight, the intruder threatened to cut the throats of the homeowner and his dog. The fight reportedly stemmed from an unreturned cell phone charger. The man apparently didn't know you could just call collect.

A fourth grade teacher had a wheel stolen and one axle dismantled and was left sitting on the side of the road. She believes her 12-year-old students were to blame for the shenanigans. At press time, Alfalfa had yet to give up his fellow Little Rascals.

The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We've added a cartoon and a little commentary. We've added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.

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