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THE WANDERING EYE ‌ The Week In Morons

Aside from the important stuff going on, last week was most entertaining

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Was it ever.

Let's start with the biggest of the nutjobs, the "Reverend" Pat Robertson.

Last Thursday, Robertson, former Republican presidential candidate and founder of the Christian Broadcasting Network and Christian Coalition, decided to warn the citizens of Dover, Pa., that they shouldn't be surprised to find themselves forsaken by God any time in the near future.

Apparently the people of Dover had committed a heinous transgression against God when they voted eight incumbent school board members out of office after they had tried to introduce a statement on "intelligent design" into high school biology curriculum.

During last Thursday's broadcast of his daily cable television show, The 700 Club, Robertson said, "I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: if there's a disaster in your area, don't turn to God, you just rejected him from your city."

Robertson continued his remarks with this little chestnut, "And don't wonder why He hasn't helped you when problems begin, if they begin. I'm not saying they will, but if they do, just remember, you just voted God out of your city. And if that's the case, don't ask for His help because He might not be there."

It would appear that God operates on a quid pro quo basis, mused The Eye.

On to the next head case: South Carolina's own Maurice Bessinger.

The self-proclaimed barbecue king and Confederate flag supporter lost another round in court last week in his crusade against the grocery stores who discontinued carrying his BBQ sauce because of his somewhat unique views on race, the Confederate flag, slavery, and the history of the American South.

The state Court of Appeals unanimously upheld the grocery stores' contention that Bessinger's complaint was without merit under the state's Unfair Trade Practices Act.

The act protects businesses from "immoral, unethical, or oppressive" behavior in the course of doing business, but the court found that dropping a product from inventory because the retailer does not support the views of the producer does not meet the standard set in the act.

The decision read, "As free market participants, the defendant grocery store chains and their respective managers have the right to choose with whom they conduct their business."

Bessinger started his suit against Bi-Lo, Publix, Piggly Wiggly, Harris Teeter, and Winn-Dixie, among others, after his mustard-based sauce was dropped from store shelves following his pro flag demonstrations during the removal of the Confederate flag from the Statehouse dome in the late 1990s.

Bessinger continues to fly the flag over his restaurants and disseminate self-produced literature that explains his claim that slavery is biblical and that slaves actually enjoyed their bondage.

He claims that the stores' decision to drop his sauce has cost him in excess of $500,000.

Bessinger is planning another appeal, this time to the state Supreme Court. The Eye wonders if he'll ride a big white horse around the state again to get his point across.

Number Three in the moron countdown should really go under the column heading of "just plain stupid."

Last week a lobbying firm with very close ties to House Speaker Bobby Harrell (R-Chas.) had to remove all vestiges of its public and electronic claims of access after some buttinsky liberal types and conservative lawmakers got their panties in a wad.

Last summer, Harrell's younger brother John announced he was opening a new Southern Strategy Group office in Columbia.

For those out of the loop, the term "Southern Strategy" has a historical connotation, in that it was the title given to the successful Richard Nixon-Strom Thurmond plan to deliver the South to the GOP back in the late 1960s.

Last August, the firm advertised its "unparalleled access to top decison-makers," and John Harrell's biography proclaimed: "John's family is deeply rooted in South Carolina politics; his father, Bob Harrell, is one of seven members of the South Carolina Highway Commission ... and his brother, Bobby, is Speaker of the [SC] House of Representatives."

Brandon Dermody, SSG's managing partner for South Carolina, told The Post and Courier that references to John were removed from company literature because "it was causing confusion" among potential clients.

He said, "They were confusing John with a lobbyist."

Hmm, noted The Eye, it's hard to see why those potential clients might reach that conclusion!

That was the week that was ... can't wait for the next one!

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